Trading Up

So, the oddest thing...

I know someone who has a transfer cable.

Fucking, I know, right? We're gonna do ourselves a little trading shuffle, alright? Guy wants an Abra 'cause he just got to Cerulean City and Abras are fucking difficult to catch.  Not as hard as Scythers, but still pretty tough...

SCYTHER WHY DON'T YOU LOVE MEEEEEEEE?!?!?!?

So, I just bought him a fucking Abra from the Game Corner, since it only costs 180 coins and there is about 190 scattered about on the floor there, so it's a free Abra.  He needed to catch something I didn't have so I could end up with that Pokemon at the end of the shuffle.

I'm walking away with a Rattata after this deal? Well, I'm gonna release this pussy and catch a Raticate right outside of Fuschia City, so I don't really care.  But he's getting an Abra for this.  Basically, a FREE Abra, since he didn't even want Rattata to begin with.  I had to catch the fucking thing for him while he was in the bathroom.  Okay, you want your Abra? Here's the cost:


Firstly, trade and trade-back my Kadabra.

I know this compromises his appearance, but I'll accept Alakazam into my Top 6 only because I didn't think I would have the ability to trade-evolve him.

Secondly, trade and trade-back my Haunter.

Gengar's got a lot of power behind him, so I'm alright with Haunter evolving, too.  Same concession made to the Top 6.

Finally, I get to name his Abra.

His name is Mr. Dicks, and he knows Mega Punch for some fuck-all reason.  Take good care of Mr. Dicks, Sean.

So I'm going through the Safari Zone, desperate to find a fucking Scyther, when I get the opportunity to  trade up for better Pokemon than ones I already have.

No need for Venonat...I have Venomoth, and he will probably be very useful against Sabrina.

And I sure as hell ain't training my level 8 Paras when I now have a level 30 Parasect.  Fucking waste of time.

So goodbye, my inferior bugs.  Enjoy your freedom.

Now, I've actually caught every Bug-type Pokemon that you are able to catch in the Generation I Red Version...

...except Scyther.

I WILL NOT LEAVE THE FUCKING SAFARI ZONE UNTIL I CATCH YOU! DO YOU THINK I A FUCKING AROUND?! I HAVE A SAVE FUNCTION ON MY GAMEBOY ADVANCE! I AM A FUCKING TIME-LORD IN THIS WORLD! TIME MEANS NOTHING TO ME!

I HAVE SAVED AFTER TAKING THE FIRST STEP INTO THE SAFARI ZONE! IF YOU DON'T COME WITH ME THE FIRST TIME, I WILL RESTART AND CONTINUE TO HUNT YOU DOWN! THERE IS NO OTHER ALTERNATIVE! RESISTANCE IS FUCKING FUTILE!

Charizard, Lvl 40

Alakazam, Lvl 37

Pidgeot, Lvl 36

Dugtrio, Lvl 35

Gengar, Lvl 30

Goldeen, Lvl 20

Pokedex: 60, Badges: 5